« Want to hear something funny? I forgot my password, and the system was clever enough to let me create a new one. It seems that artificial intelligence has finally perceived the human reality of forgetfulness. » Let’s delve into a whirlwind of tech news that appears as unpredictable as the scrolling text in Star Wars.
Launching our cosmic shuttle, let’s start with a weighty topic, the unfortunate events unrolling in Israel and Gaza. A far cry from the tech world’s virtual realities, the grim events have rocked the tech scene and the world beyond. We send our antennas out to pick signals of peace amidst the cacophony of conflict.
Leaving political galaxies behind, we enter the nebula of crypto scandals. Brilliant minds shine here, but sometimes with a faint darkness. Tales of bribery, astronomical sums of money, and clandestine activities worthy of a high-tech thriller surround the trial of crypto trailblazer Sam Bankman-Fried. In the parallel universe of acquisitions, Atlassian acquired Loom in a billion-dollar deal that makes Elon Musk’s wealth seem almost plausible.
« In a parallel universe where artificial intelligence plays the leading role and Google mandates passkeys as the defacto access passwords, Loom is acquired for a billion dollars, certified by the galactic committee. »
In another sector of our tech universe, we find an unprecedented alliance forming between Adobe, Spotify and Meta. Adobe, the grandmaster of graphics, upgrades its Firefly, making images more realistic than reality itself. Spotify, defying the laws of music streaming, is leveling up to a super-premium service, creating sonic bliss. Meanwhile, Meta Quest 3, an ingenious VR device, is making waves at a surprisingly reasonable price-point, good news for your wallet in this meteor shower of expenses.
AI tech is taking a quantum leap. OpenAI, the nonchalance-rich startup is reportedly developing its own AI chips, giving a whole new meaning to « smart chips ». Google, not wanting to be left behind, has made passkeys the new norm, bidding adieu to the era of forgotten passwords, a win for forgetful earthlings.
To spice up the tech star-studded sky, diversity takes the center stage in California. The law now mandates that VC firms disclose the diversity profile of their founding members, passing a legislation as refreshing as a comet’s tail. Speaking of refreshing things that signal the end of our tech ride through the Milky Way, take a listen to podcasts by TechCrunch’s Equity and Chain Reaction.
So lean back, grab a drink (probably something stronger than coffee), and soak in the seemingly endless and ever expanding universe of tech, where scandals, acquisitions, breakthroughs, diversity laws, and ripples of real-world events come together like constellations of code.
« In the merry world of tech, it seems passwords may finally rest in peace. So the next time you forget your password, remember, it’s not you, it’s the Universe making way for the new. Adieu, passwords! »
Source : Techcrunch
